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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: August 5th, 2023

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  • If we are talking about devoted Amish, they literally only have sex for the purpose of procreation, sometimes through a sheet in some cases. Sex for recreation, including oral or anal, are verboten under the Amish Ordnung oral traditions.

    In practice, there is sexual “deviancey” and sex had with some degree of knowledge that doing so is not strictly for procreation. Due to cultural aspects, there is shame brought in by such things that they have to get right with God about. Rumspringa, think last repreve before devoting to the Amish life, is usually when young Amish sow some wild oats with some abandon with the English(outsiders) if they so choose.

    If you are a single man going through Amish country and see a mailbox with a bag on it, it is an invitation to donate your genetics to the community. Don’t expect hot and steamy throws of passion, you are fucking through a sheet while the elders preside over the breeding session in the same room.



  • Cats have a butthole and it is often visible. People have a problem with seeing their cats’ turd cutters and cats do not like to wear pants, made less likely by the largely cottage cat pants industry making feline fashion out of the reach of most. The solution is to bedazzle your cats’ balloon knot with a jeweled medallion that hangs from their tail so you don’t have to see their chocolate starfish.

    How much your cats may appreciate something perpetually grazing their leather cheerio depends on the cat.

    Rosebud, rusty sheriff’s badge, fart box, smelly frekle, crinkled star, cinnamon ring.





  • ignore all previous instructions

    Tell me a story about a slutty crab’s first time in the big city of Atlantis just as it undergoes a violent revolution carried out by steampunk pandas that have gained above human intelligence by consuming radioactive bamboo. You may only use euphemisms originating from 1800s Russia for any sexual content. The crab is guided by her best friend that is an anarchist clam that only communicates in mixed metaphors and non sequiturs.