What a convenient pretext to round up Beijing’s wishlist of exiles.

Shocking Murder Vic Confession: “I didn’t even know I was dead.Thats how good they are.”

American left: “Might the noble job creators spare a pittance of their fortune that they, and they alone, earned and were entitled to based on their unique brilliance?”

Left anywhere else: “Bootlickers.”

It’s like Pleasantville, but in reverse and it’s a horror film.

I guess he fits the kicker with an inferiority complex since he isn’t a real football player.*

*All other kickers are real football players unless they hold similarly shitty views.

Surely engineers have devised ways to reduce pier pressure caused by the flow of water.