2025 obligatory alternatives to social distancing:

-Isolate in the office, just never go home (and keep working of course)

-Instead of not going to work, you can get a free brain worm at one of the new brain worm dispensaries

-ingest a lethal dose of Ivermectin

-Storm and plunder one of the official buildings on the list published on the Department of Patriotism’s website (must bring own gallows parts)

Says right there: they dug to find them. Actually finding them might have better chances elsewhere, on account of the bodies being elsewhere, but the light was better here and they didn’t have to walk that far.

No idea but that’s the point of view of that picture. The view clearly being my stance, not the series.

Not at all. Political enemies of the Trump clan will be checked and balanced at every turn.

And then have an out-of-body experience where you watch yourself doing that from the outside.

Look on the bright side, we’ll have so much raw data from the worst-managed possible country-sized control group. Except that they’ll probably react to attempts to document the results of their policies with book burnings and witch trials. Well, maybe we can smuggle in some camouflaged researchers or just watch the obituaries or something.

1. Not true at all. Vile lies spread by the Democrats.
2. Okay, maybe it is true, but it’s actually a good thing.
3. Okay, maybe the results are catastrophic, but it’s actually the Democrats’ fault. The solution is higher tariffs.

But he has money. If you’re rich, they let you do it.

Bit slow in the frames-per-second department though.

I dunno… Still better ratings than the star wars star cruiser hotel thingie.

Did the missiles blindfold him and then stab him in the back five times?

The regular process would be:

1. have idea for easy solution to known problem

2. think it through

3. realise that there more factors at play that would lead to other problems

Trump reaches stage 1 on a good day.

To be fair, he probably meant that only cops should be allowed to use violence with impunity, certainly not the… wink wink nudge nudge… “urban people”.

The next tesla model will have a coal oven inside it. Will still run on electricity, the oven is just in there so you can do some pollution too. The main factor in making the electric part palpable to republicans will be telling them how brown people are being exploited to get the materials for the batteries out of the ground.

Where’s all that left wing rhetoric inciting violence?

I think we can all agree that not enthusiastically agreeing with every stupid thing Trump says is exactly the same as calling for violence. In fact, not rolling over and letting Trump have whatever he wants is the greatest sin and makes the (insert bad descriptor) Left the REAL fascists!

NRA, who would gladly supply the weapons - for a price, of course - says YES!!!

Now, I hear you say, that would preemptively arm any wannabe school shooters and eliminate any leftover threshold for their shooting sprees, but the NRA has a solution to that problem too: more fear of guns means more people buying more guns to protect themselves from all the guns in circulation.

It’s beautiful, isn’t it? * wipes away single tear with dollar signs in both eyes *

No, obviously not the guns of real people, just the ones who get stopped and frisked by the police. Y’know… the ones you can tell are evil because they’re… y’know, wink wink nudge nudge “urban”.

Trump’s always been banking on everybody giving him the benefit of the doubt, and they do, but he thinks it’s because he’s so very clever that he’s tricking his opponents with his thinly veiled veneer of plausible deniability. In actuality they just do it because he’s rich.

“We want our dictator for… what are the good words again?”

“You mean freedom and democracy?”

“Yeah, whatever, for those!”

From now on, whether or not you are allowed to buy a gun will depend on which groups you check as possible victims for your killing spree.