Attention seeker. Loudmouth. Bigot. Gum model.

I’d like Kil’d by Several Accidents and … hmm … Planet, thanks.

"Och! Ye canna change the hands of Timex!

Buuut … I might just be able to bend 'em a little!"

There should be online award shows for people who made successful, long-standing memes that have become ubiquitous in our daily lives. For instance, “Congratulations to (Twitter user) AlmostJT for ‘Arthur’s Fist’. Here’s a free Lunchly!”

Has he had a tantrum and called the judge biased yet on Twitter?

Or spell it like a hood name: Marquaiyne.

Recently detained in Dubai under suspicion of terrorism (and the potential of being beheaded), he actually asked, “Don’t you know who I am?” Upon realising who he was, the authorities - feeling he’d been punished enough by being born Andrew Tate - let him go.

Doubtless that court order’ll work a treat!

Orange at school, green at home.

The New York Pussy Department strikes again!

CEO pays have. Everyone else … not so much.

Single colour monitors, kids! Single colour monitors!

Too soon.

I don’t know who that is.

At no point in his life did Luke get any. Ever. Hell, Yoda probably slung his leg over more often. But permavirgin Luke? Nope.

Not like the government is using them anyway …

Ah, the cry of teen parties everywhere in Australia when someone rips open the box, exposing the bladder: “Gooooooon!”

Well, in bad lighting, they can look like Venezuelan fishing boats, so …

Musk is working on it so he can finally find someone who loves him for himself, just like he programs it to.

Colonel looks a little tubby in the cheeks there. Has 2026 Colonel lost the weight, I wonder?