I try to read all the articles I post but for this one I noped out after 1 sentence. Enjoy!
I pictured his bowels flying out of his nose and mouth. Makes sense what happened to the poor guy.
Hate when that happens
Basically doctors fucked up and removed staples too soon. They did this to my ex after our second son was born. Took the staples out and she almost died from sepsis.
New fear unlocked
At least you won’t have that particular problem again until you read about somebody who sneezed someone else’s intestines out of his body.
Goddammit, Jeff. You’re gonna make us read this?!
Just. Goddammit.
…new fear unlocked.
Don’t sneeze
“I also propose that we put a warning on all horseradish that clearly states that if you ingest an entire bottle, that you will blow out your sphincter. Also, if anyone knows anyone that recently died with an intact size 3 sphincter, please contact me as I am currently very low on the waiting list for a donor.”
- Stan Smith
Stan Smith? The tennis guy/sneaker icon?
That might be the most Florida Man article I have ever seen. Bravo.
Shat his heart out
This is how I’m going to go, when the time comes
