President Donald Trump signed an executive order Thursday afternoon to change the name of Lake Ontario to “Lake America,” his latest escalation as he engages in a tense trade war with Canada.
“‘Lake of America’ was something I’ve been thinking about for a long time,” Trump said from the Oval Office. “We have a gulf and we have a lake. Now, all we need is an ocean. So, maybe we’ll have to change the name of the Atlantic and/or the Pacific. Maybe we’ll change them both.”
Surrounded by large maps of the Great Lakes, Trump said the name change was “effective immediately,” and that his staff had “filed all the necessary papers, documents, everything else.” A White House aide claimed the lake “has most of its volume in the United States” and that the “deepest parts” are in US territory.
Acronym to remember the Great Lakes used to be -
Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie, Superior: HOMES
Now with Trump it’s -
Superior, Huron, America, Michigan, Erie: SHAME
He gets a lot done between diaper changes
“I can’t accomplish anything of substance so I’ll make idiotic stunts and hope my deluded supporters eat it up in Nov.”
Canada renames it sewage treatment plants to “Trump Ponds”
The dumbest fucking timeline
Often described as ignorant, he changed over 300 Wadiyan words to “Aladeen,” including the words “positive” and “negative,” causing mass confusion.
Doctor: Do you want the Aladeen news or the Aladeen news?
Patient: The Aladeen news?
Doctor: You are HIV-Aladeen
Be happy it’s not Trump Lake. He’s put his name on everything he can in this country. Just like a good dictator.
I love how he got minorly blocked from literally chiseling his name into the Kennedy Center, so now he’s talking about demoing the whole thing. True abuser mentality - if I can’t have it, nobody can have it.
I only just realized he renamed an airport after himself. Like, what the fuck did you do to deserve that?
He truly is envious of the authoritarians leaders in other countries.
I know people joke, but I truly hope he lives lot enough to see his legacy dismantled.
Just tell yourself that at the same time this was happening, the smartest people working for the Canadian government were planning how to best sanction all the red and swing states to deliver the most hurt.
The irony is I’m in a blue city in a red state. At this point though I’m fine with it. I’ll survive on schadenfruede
I know he wants me to be pissed about this and he achieved his goal.
If this isn’t the phrase of the year I don’t know what is.
Not exactly. The dumbest timeline has each lake renamed to the Make America Great Again Lakes from left to right on the map.
You all laugh, but think for a moment about the poor cattle rancher currently sitting on the toilet with his lettuce diarrhea, worried about the pending foreclosure of all he has and when the ivermectin is finally going to kick in for little Billy Jr’s case of measles.
But then upon his porcelain throne he sees his dear leader with the courage and genius to redraw the name of the lake he didn’t remember existed from its communist foreign name to a name he knows and can remember, because it’s the name of where he lives and also two of his daughters.
And finally, for the first time since Obama’s shadow government made him wear a mask in 2020 for the hoax pandemic that doctors claimed killed his elderly parents but everyone knew was just a flu and also engineered by Fauci for maximum damage — he knows.
He knows it’s going to be okay.
That when Billy Jr beats this made-up measles thing and little America One and America Too and the whole family loses the ranch, that they can go to the Lake that is now their heritage by the only name they need to learn it.
And then he’ll float, staring up into the heavens, finally at peace secure in the knowledge that at long last the greatest President since Jesus is cradling his heart and interests in his diminutive bruised hands, exhausted from all the renaming of water.
I enjoyed reading this, bravo👏
Why can’t I find an obvious way to follow you and everything you post
Was explaining the propaganda of that Great to be an American song to my son. He never heard it so pulled up the music video. I had never seen it just heard the song. But the video was just that. The man singing how great America is even has he is losing everything and becoming homeless. Pretty fuck up.
Pretty fuck up.
hey, that’s what they call me! Except they don’t call me pretty.
What a deplorably designed country that one person can do all this wasteful stuff. Way more wasted by this party than the fraud they like to point out in some places, and no peep on where it’s actually worse. It’s one part of the low-level thinking that high-control groups enforce, to keep people from asking questions and finding the evidence. For example that all the other rich countries pay much less for healthcare with better outcomes, get better worker benefits and satisfaction and all that makes healthier people than the usa system. It shows that they don’t want that for everyone, just them and theirs, the selfish tradition is strong!
He’s such a child.
USA is a joke!
Just fucking die already god damnit.
Such a pathetic Trumper Tantrum.
cry baby president, needs a new map cause his feelings were hurt. pathetic.
“‘Lake of America’ was something I’ve been thinking about for a long time,"
Yeah sure you were, pedo
Can we just have one day without deplorable yank news?
I live here and I need it more than you.
Dear leader says food and fuel is cheap! We love him!
Dear leader says it’s gulf of amercia! We love him!
Dear leaders trade war isn’t hurting farmers! We love him!
Dear leader says it is Lake of America now! We love him!
Dear leader says he isn’t a pedophile! We love him!
