Chopsticks are superior anyways

I don’t know why this is posted as a shitpost. This is just life wisdom. There is a single fork in my drawer that I refuse to use, it’s basically like a salad fork, but it’s not quiet big enough to be one, but it’s too large to be used as a normal fork. I. Hate. That. Fork.

Idk why I keep this fork that’s slightly bent and I just sigh then use it.

Yup

all my forks are like that, I hate the smaller ones

Used to have a spoon like this, but I’ve since replaced all my silverware with matching pieces 😌 which is amazing btw

We have some forks which are made out of really thin tin you can bend them very easily. I hate those forks. No one uses them. I wish they would take the hint and fork off, instead they hang around trying to blend in with the better cutlery and get picked by accident.

We have two kinds: long and narrow fork and a short and wide fork. I always swap the narrow for the wide.

I also have a thing with the plates. I really don’t like using the ones that don’t have a design on them. There’s just something off about using a blank plate.

I have one fork with extra long tines. Dunno where it came from. But every time I grab it, I’m like “Yo, long boi! Youre not going to stab me this time are you?”

And the long fork does not assure me that its not going to stab me this time, because it does not like to lie.

Its not just a fork.

I also have a spoon, a butter knife, and a steak knife, that I all hate for no reason, that I actively put back if I accidentally grab them to get something else.

I hate them so much that I will just skip eating if thats all in the drawer and I dont feel like doing dishes.

I’m in my mid 40s and many of my cutlery had names. I’m not kidding. There’s Mack, the knife. Then there’s “gitty”, a fork from git. There’s “Hulk”, my favorite mother-of-Pearl egg spoon (from “spoony god”, got it?!?), another fork named “cleetus”, another knife called “Aragorn”, a huge serving spoon called “Schaffer” (a German thing, from “schaffen”, getting it done), an old knife called Emily (cause it’s blunt), a fork called “Becki” from Bakelite, it’s end of made from it (no dishwasher for Becki, ever), a 2 prong fork called “Chris”, from Christopher Pike, the star Trek captain, “butters” the butter knife, “Ichi”, the Japanese crazy Sharp straight knife, regularly sharpened on “Neil” and “Kappa”, the diamond and the water stone and the list goes on and on. Don’t ask about the other stuff, like “Wicket”, the electric wok. E-wok. Right. That one. I guess, it became kind of a hobby.

Forks where the back half is heavier then the front half give me so much rage. Why my fork keep falling off my plate???

I feel seen!

At age 35 you should be considering throwing out (well, donating) the misc silverware for a matching set, I think. This was more of an issue in my 20s when my silverware was all mismatching.