• Chefdano3@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Wait I get an office? Fuck man I don’t mind sharing with any one of these people. It beats the hell outta being in a cubicle row surrounded by all of them, which has been my experience so far.

  • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Wallace.

    Dude just wants to shut up and work, make it to retirement. You could probably engage him about his grandkids or his fishing trip if you wanted.

    All the rest of them are gonna want to bother you with their problems or hobbies.

  • wolfpack86@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    The answer is Wallace. Every old dude with a desk near me has been a solid guy who shuts the fuck up and always makes coffee before I get in.

      • WoodScientist@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        People have different circadian rhythms on average as they age. We simply associate the pattern of those middle aged and older with virtue. Middle age and old people raise children, and they teach children that the sleep patterns of the elders are wise and just, while the sleep patterns of the youth are slovenly and sinful. Our entire concept of “early” is defined by what middle age and older people simply adapt to naturally without force or effort. Older folks tend to wake up at a certain hour, so we just declare that the hour everyone is expected to wake at.

        The most insidious form of this temporal bigotry is how we typically force high school students to start school at the earliest time of day of any school students, even though high school students have the latest natural waking time of any age group. We value “teaching lessons” to our youth more than we do actually teaching them. So we drag them out of bed at an unnaturally early hour so that they can make class at 7 AM. We then berate and shame them for being sleepy and inattentive in the unnaturally early classes we require them by law to attend.

        And I say all this as someone in their late 30s who naturally wakes up pretty early. From an evolutionary perspective, it makes a great deal of sense why we have people with different natural sleep and wake times, and for those preferences to shift with age. We spent several hundred thousand years living as small groups huddled around campfires. Part of warding off predators is having people on watch through the night. Having people who don’t have to fight to stay awake late into the night makes that guard duty so much easier. In prehistory, I imagine the young adults staying up late into the night after the adults are asleep, enjoying some time to themselves, tending the fire, and watching for predators. The last of the youth to go to sleep would trade off with the earliest rising of the elders. We are a social species. We are evolved to live in groups. And a group is more effective with a diversity across many characteristics, including sleep/wake times.

        But we’ve forgotten this fact and turned a simple consequence of evolution into a moral issue. And for that, we as a society abuse our youth and force them to wake at unnaturally early hours for the sake of puffing up the sense of moral superiority of the middle aged and older. Collectively, our relation to early waking times, and especially how we use it to collectively abuse our children, is one of our greatest sins as a culture.

        • Oneser@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          You put the “L” in “LLM”.

          (/s if needed - I absolutely thrive on extensive word jamborees)

      • Jumpingspiderman@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Because we have to get up to pee a bunch of times during the night and eventually can’t sleep at all so we get up for the day. Which results in our being tired AF and having to go to bed early.

      • wolfpack86@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        My favorite old guy I worked with, I was around 25 at the time, he was early 70s.

        We used to joke that I’d call him with a wake up call when I was getting home from the bar, and he could return the favor when he took his morning break. He was in the office every day at 5:30.

    • BranBucket@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Wallace. Wallace probably doesn’t give a fuck anymore, and once you gain his trust, is going to say some hilarious shit as a result.

      • JoeKrogan@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Thats it, he knows the company doesn’t give a fuck and hes just waiting it out. Also I bet he has some stories or wisdom to bestow.

        • nomous@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Yeah Wallace is solid, he’s just running out the clock at this point. Bring in some snacks and treat him like a human and he’ll do anything he can to help you.

  • Delphia@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I eat an insanely high protein diet and I crossfit regularly… “I’m not locked in here with you, You’re locked in here with me!”

  • elliot_crane@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Yeah this is an easy Shiloh angle for me. I’m down for some Radiohead every now and then, and when I’m not, that’s what noise cancelling headphones are for.

  • Shardikprime@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Hannah: Get her to invite me to the wedding, meet her friends and all the social circle. Very helpful to grind that social experience

    Caleb: dude is probably shredded and knows not only how to eat healthy, but, by comparison, will force you to eat healthy as well. Probably can help with grinding the social experience as well

    Wallace: if you get him to open up and share his work experience, this could be the teaching of a lifetime. Also helps to grind the social experience as he probably has young nephews, and family gatherings to invite you

    These 3 are my best choices